radmarshallb

Vanilla Scented

I just got back from the grocery store, where I purchased, you know, groceries. Bread, juice, iced tea, and the other essentials. One of the other things I got were some trash bags. But not just any trash bags. No. These were specially engineered odor eliminating trash bags, with (I swear to God) a hint of vanilla scent.

I hope the intern who thought to market the trash bags being manufactured near a vanilla air freshener got a huge raise. I already contributed $6.99 to it.

LOLCAT

Picture Website

I went through my iPhoto yesterday and organized some stuff. Since I have a .mac account, I figured I ought to make an iWeb page and post some pictures. So here it is. Some of the gems awaiting inside include:

and

Check it out.

Proof that God hates me

A few days ago I ordered a pair of speakers that I've had my eye on for a long time. After getting a new desk, and seeing how lonely my MacBook Pro was, I decided it was time to take the plunge. I ordered them online and within 24 hours had received notice that they had shipped. Perfect.

After waking up, the first thing I did was hop on my compy to see where my speakers were. Salt Lake City - In Transit was all I was told. Expected delivery date of today. I don't know if you're aware or not, but today lasts for several hours. UPS's website doesn't provide estimated delivery times and apparently just expect you to stay home all day long if you want a package delivered to you. They expect you to rush to your window every time a loud truck drives by and eagerly open your door every few minutes in case you had been chewing too loudly when the UPS guy knocked on your door. I'm pretty sure it's in the Terms and Conditions somewhere.

So after waiting a good portion of the many many hours that combine to make 'today', I decided it would be safe to run to the grocery store for some hot sauce (you can't eat frozen burritos without them, after all). Big mistake. I got home and found a little sticky note on my door that said something to the effect of 'We're sorry you had something else to do today. Your package may or may not be delivered sometime in the future. You blew it."

So I drove down to the UPS warehouse where all the homeless packages go to spend the night and rescued my speakers. I finally got them home, opened the package, plugged everything in and... VIOLA! No sound.

I played with all the dials again to make sure I wasn't missing anything and in desperation unplugged it from my computer and into my iPod. And they sang forth glorious tunes (Well... Phil Collins actually. It was on Shuffle. Leave me alone.)

A few pairs of headphones later, and I had confirmed it. My computer's sound output was dead. And I used it just days prior. The most logical explanation is that God zapped it the second I pressed the 'order' button to buy the speakers. He's getting back at me for that one time I told my 6 year-old cousin that if Jesus really loved him, his puppy wouldn't have died. You win this time, God.